I am looking forward to sitting still.

When I imagine life after being released from the talons of PD, I think about how peaceful it will be to sit in a chair and not feel my body shake. Not to be exhausted by constant tremors or have my muscles bound by rigidity.

To be able to walk down the street with both arms swinging casually and not have to concentrate on each step. Not having to worry about stumbling or tripping because my left leg does not want to do as it is told.

At the moment these simple things are beyond my reach. In order to get them back I am considering a few options that have become available.

There are new medications coming up which may prove to be more than spectacular. I am also considering having a small hole drilled in the top of my skull and a needle inserted into my brain to implant stem cells. The fact that I will be awake the entire time with only a local aesthetic to mask the pain of the drill seems a small price.

I have to admit, the procedure scares the hell out of me but I will seriously consider it if I feel that all other options have been exhausted, in order to get back what Parkinson’s has taken away.

I want the old me back, to be the Eros I once used to be………….when it felt like nothing could stop me.

My friends would say that I am an eternal optimist. I am always looking on the bright side with a glass half full approach. My confidence once allowed me to talk freely and easily with anyone anywhere.

Parkinson’s has made me more reserved. I am conscious of people’s stares and uncomfortable with people I don’t know.

My passion for skiing would take me to beautiful mountain ranges throughout the world where I would enjoy a week or two of glorious skiing with good friends. At first I noticed that it was a little awkward when I turned left. Now my body simply does not respond to the instructions necessary to move. I now struggle to spend only a few hours on skis and being forced to give up through utter fatigue.

I have every intention of getting this all back.